Such was the plight of the two deathly members; GI Joe and Le Booby in late
July of this year. Both had been successfully recruited to teach at the 2004
ESL Suwon University Camp; a good means of earning some stash for touring
their worn suitcases of toys around North Asia. And as we see later, it
proved a successful means, with shows in the capital, Seoul, 2 shows in
Beijing (China) and another 3 in Japan (2 in Fukuoaka and one in Tokyo).
Though it was somewhat a rigorous camp in terms of workload (on site 12 hrs
a day from 9am to 9pm) tears were shed, windows were broken, earths were
moved, and even a sneak preview was given to the kiddies upon farewell party
night! Here is a little diary of what went on over summer in Korea, China
and Japan.

FRIDAY 13TH AUGUST 2004 SUWON UNIVERSITY ESL CAMP

'And tonight kids here are some of your teachers to do a little concert for
you! Introducing Toydeath from Australia! Yessiree that's the way we are
announced to some 120 kids and teachers; although it probably should have
been, 'your friendly English teachers cum heathen stalkers who play toys for
fun. Pity we couldn't be masked for the event either. I mean, where was the
anonymity. Someone said the kids may shudder! Oh well, we're gonna look
funny up there on stage costume-less and mask-less but what the heck!

I think the kids and teachers are kinda baffled when GI Joe and Le Booby
open their shoulders with some rock riffs and I shout aimlessly into a
loudspeaker. Still, colleagues that they are, they roar with approval, some
squirming, some laughing, but all clapping on song as we rip into ROCKPIG
(thanx Rose for the great words and tune). We bow in approval; a brief hit
of fame with Korean kids that was well worth it.

SUNDAY 15TH AUGUST 2004 'BULGASARI NIGHT' RUSH IN SINCHON

The big day for this weekend was always going to be on Sunday with our
Japanese friend Sato Yukie who runs a very unique improvisational night in
Sinchon, Seoul. We'd been the week prior to check it out and were all
suitably impressed with what Yukie is doing there.

An experimental kind of guy from a very experimental kind of place, Tokyo,
Japan, Yukie has been running these nights once a month for the sheer hell
of providing an outlet for people who are tired of K and J pop or R and B ,
or even rap and hip hop. Yukie is like a fanzine rock player on speed; such
is his adrenaline and energy for putting on interesting nights. He does his
own share of playing, whether it be twisting sounds of toys through his amp
or manipulating sounds with his guitar. He has a great armoury of friends
too, Korean and Japanese and has been privy to shows from people from
countries such as Mongolia and India. Earlier in the year he coaxed his old
mate Damo Suzuki (Can) not long after Damo had made some racket in the
Australian summer. Other notorieties that Yukie has introduced to Korea
include I.S.O, Jojo Hiroshige (Japanese noise guru), Carl Stone (father of
the laptop who hails from the US and is now lecturing in Nagoya), Ichiraku
Yushimitsu, and Otomo Yoshihide who has released material on John Zorn's
very good label Tzadik.

We check in early, plonk the toys on the stage and make sure their all wired
and ready for when we play which is about 3 hours away. Im feeling a pinge
of nerves as we await our time to play so what better than a few Korean ales
to refresh the palette. Now Korean beer aint the best in the world; for
those who have tried it, it washes a nice barbeque meat or seafood well, but
it's fairly weak in content and watery to say the least! Still it serves
it's purpose. While we drink and chat to fellow audience people the
Bulgasari collective does their thing on stage - it's all noise and
soundsapes created by people dabbling buttons on computers, manipulating
sounds. The people before us, Ono Ryoko on saxophone and Usui Yasuhiro on
guitar (both from Nagoya) + Yukie combine to make some pretty mean improv'
noise - man can Ono play that sax - such wild blowing - GI Joe, an old
prodigy of the phone, tells me she has amazing circular breathing - ah, my
ears are bleeding but it was a good bleeding if you know what I mean!

The time has come for us to be introduced as the final band of the evening.
We shuttle out of a very small room at the back of the bar cladded this time
in our gear. Yuki does this great hands on introduction and before we know
it we're pushing buttons, manipulating sounds and creating some mayhem of
our own which seems to go down pretty well! Despite the odd hiccup of
co-ordinating leads and holes and whatever Im pretty chuffed by the end of
it - those few bad Korean beers got me through maybe. Le Booby and GiJoe
look pretty content signing their beloved cds away at the end of it all.
Yukie too thanx us by taking us to a soju tent up the road which is open
24/7- we share the spoils of a fun evening and despite the soju hangovers
the following morning we're all in love with Korea!

The next day we're booked in for a performance in the Korean subway in the
depths of Sadang Station; about 40 minutes from the heart of Seoul. Yukie
tells us we will be playing around 7pm which by Korean work standards is the
start of the peak hour - or should we say peak hours! Seoul is one city that
never stops - the traffic is relentless albeit on the subway where people
compete for standing space or on its congested roads which amble at a snails
pace. When we get there, all armed with suitcases and roaming toys, we are
met with kind hospitality from a man who introduces himself as Mr Park -
finder and leader of the Kor Art Rail movement which works towards helping
bands and performers with shows on the Korean subway system - he shows us a
calendar of past
and future performances that range from classical, K pop, Yukie and his
experimental friends and a bunch of Australians that manipulate toys for
sound - hmm sounds familiar??

When we are kindly introduced by Mr Park we walk out to a fully seated
'interested' crowd. They hang around for the whole show too - neither
challenging nor walking away from us - they seem to like the theatrics of it
all and it's another real buzz which one gets from performing. After we
finish I notice some of my baffled yet happy students in the crowd - I didnt
realise that they were on their way home from the nearby university that I
now work at! Yukie, Ono and Yasuhiro do their noise thing which baffles and
suprises most onlookers - 'where are the earplugs!'

As touring generally goes there is some kind of schedule that relentlessy
rolls along the long nights of playing, drinking, eating and yakking. This
morning we find ourselves at Incheon Airport ready to board a flight to
Beijing to meet two strangers - Tang and Yuan who have kindly offered to
help show us around the big city and help us with directions to our hotel
etc. Before even getting to Beijing we take an exciting taxi ride to the
airport armed with our bags and these strange sounds emanating from the
squeals of Barbie and to the growls of the Hullk fist while the taxi driver
drives on somewhat unpeturbed!

Upon arriving at Beijing airport we are squished into long lines (its summer
holiday peak season) to show our passports then the luggage is checked. All
is ok - the toys are all silent as we walk out of arrivals into the arms of
our greeting 'to be' friends who whisk us away in a cab to our accomodation
in the city's downtown. The traffic is definitely a buzzing as we peer out
the windows at big advertising signs for the 2008 Olympics - 'gee isnt
Greece only happening as we speak???!'. There seems to be a growing campaign
to get Beijing all spruced up for 008 - one difference between Seoul and
here is that the streets seem wider and there doesnt seem to be that
manic'ness that greets u in Seoul- Beijing has a lot more space; people go
about things at their own pace; old men on hot balmy days tuck their
singlets up to their chests to let their bellies hang out - i cant imagine
guys in suits or really anyone in cosmetico Korea doing the same!

Our guests take us out for a scrumptious dinner washed down by some very
lovely and very cheap Chinese beer - the plates of food are huge and for 5
of us we could have probably fed 10! Around us is a night market kind of
area with clothes and different elements of Chinese authenticity - singlets,
bellies, cigarettes, rice whisky, bicycles and I mean shitloads of em,
people, etc etc.

Arriving early before the weekend we have a free day or two to look around
Beijing. Now this place definitely caters to the tourist and I mean by
bucketloads of packages tours going to and fro to walls and castles and
palaces ad jade shops. The following morning after arrival we walk into
Tiannemen Square and hawkers impound on us like flies on shit. GI gets his
fair share of attention in the name of books, calendars and kites, Le Booby
wants nothing of it, while I have a mini manic panic attack because 'some
people' dont know how to accept the word NO but hey alas 'this is Tiannmenn
Square Beijing, scene of awful tragedy and the centre of the capital of the
most populated country in the world where there are no social welfare
offerings like the ones we are used to - people have to sell to survive tho u
wonder who is taking who's and what's cut! When the day finished we return
to our hotel to drink yummy long necks of Chinese beer at the ridiculous
price of 68 cents (Aus) a bottle.

The next day we do more loopy touristy things - we take a cab (cheap by most
standards) about an hr out of town to the Summer Palace; a maze of very old
buildingsfrom the Dynasty days tho one cant help to notice the facelifts
that they have had. Hawkers abound and the Palace becomes more like a
tourist Disney land as postcards clothing and jewellrey are sold - I manage
to get ripped off in the change I was given for some postcards - I didnt
realise till later in the day that I had been given some money from Belarus
instead of Chinese Yuan!

On the Friday, August 20, we take the beloved toys to the location of our
first Chinese show - its on at (nick or melissa can u fill me in here with
the name of the Gallery) a big warehouse space that accomodates numerours
galleries and the like - a pretty cool place outside of downtown Beijing
that caters to art students - walking around the area we check out some
great graffitti and sculptures. The staff upon soundchecking get really
excited about the different toy sounds; once we are finished the organiser
of the night ( forgot his name - do either of u remember??) whisks us all
off for some local szechuan food at a restaraunt located amongst all the
galleries- we chow on some very spicy delicacies washed down by some yummy
beer - quite amazing really the hospitality of it all - just about every
nite thus far we have been taken out for some meal - hence the hospitality
of the chinese and their appreciation of performing!

Such appreciation is shown on both nights by the audience who seemed rather
intrigued and happy to watch us! Both nights we are supported by the very
good Panda Twin (one night masked and the other unmasked) who do some great breakcore!

We manage to sell some CDs
and we end up leaving Beijing pretty chuffed at the response of the people
and the knowledge to come back and do it again someday!

The following Thursday August 26 would be my last night - a show at a place
called Club Lovo in Hongdae (Seoul) - the place is of the salubrious kind -
two different levels, nightclub prices but a good crowd expected. A DJ does
how thing for nearly an hr or so as we climb into our little change room on
the first level - by the time the DJ puts another damn track on we manage to
make a grand entrance choosing befuddled audience members to dance with us
to his sounds. After pretty much hijacking his space we manage to get the
audience focusing on the stage - for 30 minutes or so they lock themselves
into our zone - some dancing; some singing out expletibes; most having a fun
fun time!